Mental Vitamins

Word of the Day: Advisor

Posted in Word of the Day by larsweborg on April 5, 2010

“Hmmm.  Hmmm.  Yes.  Yes, I see.  Very strong.  Yes.  Yes.  Very, very interesting.”

Not sure if these were cues to begin the conversation, she just sat nodding and smiling.

“And I see you also volunteer your time at the animal shelter.”

“That’s right.  Once when I was little I witnessed a dog being-”

“And you’ve also got musical talents, I see.”

“Yes, last Spring I was named to the Southern Illinois all-regional-”

“But tell me, do you aspire towards excellence?”

“Well, of course I do.  I never once-”

“Because if I’m going to see to it your application be accepted, I want to make damn sure you won’t let me down!”

“I don’t mean to sound pushy, sir, but I think my-”

“Let me tell you a story.  A story about a boy who was once your age.  He sat right where you’re sitting now and he promised me, promised me, dear, that I could forward his application with utmost confidence in his abilities.  And do you know what happened?”

“No, sir.  I can’t imagine-”

“He’s now the president of the Chicago Board of Trade.  Can you imagine!?  The Chicago Board of Trade!”

“That’s terrific, sir, I’ll bet you’re awful-”

“That’s right.  And he owes it all to me.  Do you know when I last heard from him?”

“I assume you-”

“Yesterday.  Just yesterday!  Isn’t that remarkable?”

“Truly inspiring, sir.  I just hope-”

“He calls me as if I were his own father.  And why does he do this?”

“Certainly it’s because-”

“Because without my divine intervention, he’d be half the man he is today.  And he knows it!”

“You are undoubtedly-”

“Now, how can I be sure that you will be the same success as that boy so many years ago?”

“Sir, all I ask is for a chance.”

“Fine then, I’ll inform you of my decision next week.”

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